I have always believed that God is not in the business of forcing us. I think that truth is pretty well illustrated by the fact that we all know people who have chosen to not believe or who have turned away from their faith. I don't think that the Giver of freedom is big on locking us into a structured, unmoving set of beliefs.
But sometimes other Christians make me feel that way.
Sometimes my brothers and sisters in Christ want me to just say what they want to hear and nothing else. Sometimes there is not room to express my thoughts, doubts, fears, and questions. No one wants to hear them. I will be judged if I say these things out loud. I will be condemned as unfaithful.
I would like for all of us to take a moment to consider all the things we cannot say in church. Now say it. Outloud. Leave a comment, or don't; but just say something. Don't be afraid.
I'll start: I think that what we do matters way more than what we say and I think we talk way too much. I sometimes want to tell people that they don't get to have an opinion if they aren't willing to do the work to fix the problem. And I want to yell at them for being so narrow.
1 comment:
I've always been afraid to just say "I'm struggling" in church. I don't know if anyone else feels like that, but I've always felt like I shouldn't express my struggling.
Over this past year I've really struggled with intimately knowing God for myself (and not based off of my mom's or my close friends relationships.) It took a lot for me to realize that I "knew" God (in my head) but I didn't know him in my heart. But for the longest time I'd sit in church and wonder "am I the only one here questioning this? am i the only one who doesn't know if they believe in God?" I always felt like I couldn't express myself then, that I'd be condemned for thinking such thoughts.
I've been blessed to be plugged into a church that openly encouraged my questons, my doubts, and my struggles. I think that's really important. No one is perfect and life gets hard. I think my friend Tim put it well when he said "The church isn't a pretty place full of plastic people."
Just my thoughts. :)
<3 Jenn
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